As some of you know, I just returned from a rather epic trip to Europe. (Pinch me!) It came with all the rich, delicious coffee, fruity wine, and smooth, frothy beer you might imagine. It also came with the shocking discovery that Europe has a Universal Pee Tax. Yes, you got it: Pay-As-You-Go Toilets (that pun just wrote itself, people).
Suddenly the lack of water consumption (you have to ASK for water) makes sense. What appear to be circular phone booths in London? Yeah, those are coin-operated Port-O-Potties on the street corner. There was NO WAY I was going to waltz into a corner pee booth in the middle of a busy intersection to announce my need to pee to passersby even if my eyeballs were swimming.
Thank God every city we visited was experiencing a heat wave, because I could count on sweating out at least some of my fluid intake, right? Too personal? Sorry, not sorry, because when you are a Frugal (a-hem *cheap!*) Yankee confronted with PAY toilets you begin to monitor and *discuss* your bathroom needs like an elderly aunt with incontinence issues. I’ve never thought about, planned for and talked about bathrooms more in my life.
The pay-as-you-go system reveals an entire, untapped industry (at least from this American’s perspective). The train station in Vienna is high-tech with coin-operated turnstiles that print a Pee Pass (a ticket showing you paid). McDonald’s toilets print a ticket that doubles as a coupon for that same amount which is, quite frankly, marketing genius. Near the Charles Bridge a girl stands at the base of a dingy staircase in the bowels of a nearby building making change for tourists who haven’t moderated their fluid intake. Then there is the toilet in the Prague subway where the toilet paper is kept OUTSIDE the bathroom stall. That’s right. You pay, are dispensed an amount for your needs, and let in. This raises obvious questions: What if I need more? Do I slide a coin under the door? Will the price per sheet go up, leaving me open for extortion? Needless to say, I held it and walked back into the sunshine, determined to sweat it out.
Europe IS an amazing and beautiful place, and you should visit if given half the chance. But if you are there and need to pee, I recommend Salzburg. Specifically the airport. The toilets are modern, shockingly clean and, most importantly, FREE.
I liked the Free one in the eastern France park wherewe we reenacted . It was a big single clean cement building with a stainless ring to sit on & a clean sink .
After you are done ,by English directions , close & lock the door , the floor is flooded with soapy water twice .
All is well unless a guy opens & locks the door twice then sits resting his pants on the floor . You guessed it , the floor & feet & pants are dutifilly washed . Embaressed !
Better than just the pipe hole in some .
7 a clean sink .. When you closed & locked the door af
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Thankfully, I encountered neither a pipe hole nor had my pants inadvertently laundered. Although the Vienna train station had some weird swirling toilet seat thing going on that was a bit freaky. Where you expect the flush button to be there’s a button that “sanitizes” the bowl by turning the seat 360 degrees around while spewing water. I “sanitized” a few times before I figured out how to actually flush. LOL